Section 5 - Length and Strength
A thing can be short or long. A thing is usually short.
A thing can be strong or floppy. A thing is usually strong.
Sanity-check swinging a long thing:
if the noun is strong:
say "[You] might hit something with [the noun]." instead.
Instead of swinging a long thing:
if the noun is wearable:
say "[You] swing [the noun] dashingly over a shoulder. I feel foolish now.";
otherwise:
say "[You] swing [the noun] from one hand, to no special effect."
Sanity-check swinging a short thing:
if the noun is not a person:
say "There's not really a lot of extent to [the noun] to make [it-them] satisfying to swing." instead.